


Right Here Waiting

by totilott



Series: A Groovy Kind of Love [6]
Category: DCU (Comics), Justice League International (Comics)
Genre: 1980s, Angst, Coma, Guilt, M/M, Monologue, Songfic, also booster's sister, finally acknowledging stuff that's in continuity amiright
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-31
Updated: 2019-05-31
Packaged: 2020-03-29 21:14:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19028068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/totilott/pseuds/totilott
Summary: Ted's in a coma. Booster comes to visit.





	Right Here Waiting

Hi, Beetle. It’s...

It’s Booster.

They tell me jury’s still out on whether you can hear me, but I though I might...

God, that’s so cliché, right? “I don’t know if you can hear me, but --” Like we’re in some kind of melodrama. Remember me in your Oscar speech, Beetle. I want a shout-out.

Um.

You’ve been in a coma for nine days now. For those of you keeping score at home.

We’re doing fine, by the way. Don’t worry. Max and Oberon are doing fine. Well, Oberon’s really milking the whole combat wound thing, we can’t shut him up about it. But you haven't... You didn’t do any lasting damage, they’re fine.

I know that wasn’t really you, Beetle. You... You couldn’t help it. Batman told us about the hypnosis thing, they say that in Bialya, they... They put some kind of programming in your head? Without any of us noticing, not even you. And I keep wondering if... If it was that night. And I made you cover for me. Nobody knows, because you didn't want me to get into trouble.

I’m sorry.

I was... I was wrapped up in my own shit. I was making an absolute ass out of myself back there and I shouldn’t have left you for a second.

I’m sorry, Ted. I’m so sorry.

Mm.

Wow, that’s, uh, some bouquet Bea and Tora got you, huh?

I....

I miss you.

I just, I just want you back, the same. They tell me with the hypnosis thing, you probably did some damage in there trying to fight it, and you’re conked out while your brain is trying to fix itself.

Hah. That’s how much they had to dumb it down for me, you know.

I’m sorry. You’d probably understand this better. You’re not stupid like me.

Please just -- take however long you need, Beetle. I’ll wait. We’ll all wait, just... Just be _you_ when you wake up, okay? Or if, if you’ve forgotten how to do electronics or your Star Trek trivia or how to walk, that’s fine, that’s fine, I’ll... We’ll be there, we’ll help you. Just be _you_.

God, just. Give me a moment.

Ah.

Did, uh...

Did you know I’m a twin?

My sister Michelle.

Like it wasn’t enough with one of me, right? Hah.

No, that’s not... That’s not fair to her.

I don’t -- I haven’t really talked about her. To anyone. Not just you.

I don’t know what it’s like with other siblings, you know, but with a twin... She was first, you know, four minutes older than me and boy did she never let me forget it. But I -- from the moment I was born she was there, I came into the world with a best friend. I was so lucky. She was just... this _constant_ , you know? And things weren’t always so great at home but she was there, and she was smarter, and kinder, and more patient than I’ll ever be.

And I thought I’d always have her.

Um.

When she died, I....

It's like I lost half of myself.

Like the best parts of me was her.

Jeez, that’s so self-obsessed to say. Everything's always about Booster, right? She was a _person_ , this brilliant girl with her own shit to deal with and I just left. I just let her fend for herself back home, chasing my own dream. She was a constant for me while I just left her.

And when she found me again I made her chase my dream too. _Mine_. And she...

And now she’s dead.

Hah. Jesus.

You should start charging for therapy sessions, Beetle. You’d make a mint. You’re doing some great listening here.

You’re probably sitting in there like “My brain is in tatters and I have to listen to this goober give me his life story?”

Fuck.

I think I had a point somewhere. I was going somewhere with this.

I had a twin. Michelle. And she was half of me, the best parts of me from the moment I was born, and... And she’s gone, and half of me is gone. Just a, a, _void_. Empty. And I was sure I’d live the rest of my life like that, carrying all that emptiness around.

But I met you and...  
  
You can’t be that half, Ted. But you’re... You’ve filled in a little bit of that space. You’ve made me feel like I can fill some of that space too. Be in some of that half myself. Michelle will... There will always be a void where Michelle was but when I’m with you I see more of _me_ , I feel like more than just a half.

So you better come back and help me fill that space.

Ah.

Look, if... if you pull through, _when_ you pull through, I swear I'll tell you. I'll tell you everything. I've been thinking so much about it and I think if I want to become _me_ I need to come clean to you. I don't know how you'll take it, or if you'll hate me, but I'm so sick of keeping secrets from you.

God, that time already. They’re about to urge me out, Beetle. You need your beauty sleep. You’re getting so much of that you’ll come out on the other side looking like Tom Cruise. You'll get that Oscar yet.

I’ll be back, I’ll try to be less of a downer next time, okay?

Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.

I love you Ted.

**Author's Note:**

> I have a fondness for the 'There's something very wrong with the Blue Beetle' JLI story arch, so obviously it would be included. In general I never meant this series to be completely untethered to the original continuity OR follow it slavishly. It's a little system I like to call "Did that arch/plot point really make an impression on me the first time I read the series? Then it's going IN, baby!"
> 
> Joking aside, this was a challenging chapter to write. Without getting too personal, a few years ago someone I love was in a coma and it's not like in the movies. They pulled through, but a thing like that leaves its marks on everyone.
> 
>  **[Song:](https://open.spotify.com/user/tilly_stratford/playlist/4SqomvmhyncWPEAobYUZ88?si=DNXWufsLSs29KqRywW2U9A)**  
>  Right here waiting - Richard Marx


End file.
